Living in the North East of Scotland and being a speech and language therapist surrounded by 'bumf' and jargon, I was tickled by this viral email of Doric office speak that came in today. As Kim Mears says in 'My top resources' in the Autumn 10 issue of Speech & Language Therapy in Practice, such humourous emails can make your day… They also remind us that standardised phonology assessments have their limitations!
General |
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Process Flowcharts |
The wye tae dee things |
Departments |
Bourachies o' Fowk |
Roles (Job Titles) |
Fit the folk are caa'd |
Resources |
Handy things tae hae handy |
Value |
Foo mony or foo muckle |
Unit of measure |
Foo mony or foo muckle fit |
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Concepts and Standards |
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Quality |
Fit wye a thingmie's fit for fit it's supposed tae fit |
Competency |
Fit ye're fit for |
Business Risk |
Onything that can mak' an erse o'fit ye're trying tae dee |
Documentation |
Bumf |
Document Register |
Faur tae look for mair bumf |
Retention Period |
Haud on til't for |
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Processes |
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Process Reference |
Fit it's caa'd |
Process Title |
Fit it's tae dee wi' |
Process Owner |
Heid mannie |
Approver |
Fa says "aye" |
Draft |
Nae quite feenish'd |
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Tasks (within a process) |
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Task |
Fit's deen |
Responsible |
Fa does't |
Informed |
Tell't |
Consulted |
Speired at |
Assists |
Gies a haun til |
Accountable |
Fa's heid's on the block if a'thing gings erse ower tit |
Create |
Mak up |
Refer to |
Hae a lookie at |
File/Archive |
Pit awa' |
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Project Completion |
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Project |
Jobbie |
Completion Checklist |
Ticketyboo tick list
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So whether you're a heid mannie identifying onything that can mak' an erse o' fit ye're trying tae dee, you're nae quite feenish'd that jobbie you're working on, or you're arguing the case for more handy things tae hae handy, I hope all is ticketyboo with you the noo.